Monday, 13 September 2010

A Scary Number called Age!!!

Hiya Guys,

Its been almost a week since I blogged anything. First of all, Thanks to all my readers for encouraging me... It is nice to be praised for a change!...

Nice topic eh!.. I know!... I turn a year older pretty soon and thought this is a nice topic to be touched upon..

Honestly speaking, Age is an enigma to me.. I have never understood the characteristics of Age..

When I was three, I got my first sibling. I dont remember all of it, but yes, I do remember people telling me, now that I have a sibling, I should act older.. I am yet to grasp how a three year old acts.. and by the looks of it, I never will cos, my son steps into his 3rd year soon... and I cant get hold of him...:)
Anyways,  At 3, because of my sister I was considered to be elder. When I turned 4, I started school, This probably was the biggest transition yet in my life then and I could no more feel responsible than I was at the age 3.. Moving on,  I grew older.. or atleast the numbers around my age increased, 4 to 5 to 6 .. I did find some changes in life like, I had more to study.. I had another sibling (which meant I am more elder by then.. Whatever that meant!) and I could travel alone under adult supervision ( read School bus.. Without parents) But, Yet, I didnot feel a day more than 3.. I enjoyed playing like I did when I was three. I was as innocent as I was at 3 ofcourse, I might have looked a different than I was at 3 but I didnot feel that.. I grew up.. Time went on, and my age kept on increasing... More studies, More responsibilities ( I had two siblings, U see, so I was supposed to be the elder one  as I said earlier), but yet, I was pretty much the same in my basic characteristics..  I grew up, I went to college and eventually graduated from college..

Now you might say, in All this transition, I must have felt the growing up.. Yes, I did feel the growing up then, As years went on and on, I did feel more and more responsibilities on me, More burden of studies and more independance.. But From within, I was the same 3 year old who still liked to play, enjoyed playing with every small bit of paper or the likes of it, Enjoyed the occasional pampering by my mum, still cried for my failures and rejoiced at my successes...

After my graduation, I started work.. Now, after this the Age is just a shrouding mystery to me.. Every year, My birthday arrives, and I grow a year older but I dont really feel the difference by what I was a day before my birthday and a day after that.. I feel pretty much the same.. For me, my Birthday is just like any other day in my life..
When I was 3, I used to lookup to people who were in the 1st Grade as the most responsible people ever on earth, Eventually, when I reached the 1st Grade, I realised that the 1st graders then were just kids like me.. In the same way, when I was 16, I used to look up to my seniors and could vouch that there is no one who is more responsible.. But when I reached the final year of college I was as clueless as I was at the age of 16..

The age group of responsible people just increased as I grew and tomorrow I would be entering an age which My mum says is a respectable age to be mature, have control over one's life, would have planned well ahead for the future..But Honestly, I am not sure at this age. I still feel like a young child left in a place with a lot of doors and confused to find the right one.. I am not a mature individual, Not responsible, I dont have any control over things in my life nor have I planned well Ahead for my future...
I am not feeling a day older than what I was last year this day or all the previous years on the same day!.. Then what is Age??

I dont have any answer... I hope I feel a little differently tomorrow than the way I feel today.. I hope I feel I am 27.. ( Although, I dont know what that feeling should be) :)... Because, I still enjoy playing, I can play with any bit of paper or the likes of it, still Enjoy the occasional pampering by my mum, still cry for my failures and rejoice at my successes!

2 comments:

  1. Hi nikki,

    Well first of all... "HAPPY BIRTHDAY"

    i notice tat ur blog is being interesting day by day... may b coz of ur age :P

    i think as age increases v tend to learn more and more things... tats the oly advantage of age :)

    U have to enjoi ur life as it is... well responsible or not being happy is main thing.... :)

    i live wit tat mantra...
    and also one more thing... guys and gals differ their thinkin on the topic of thier "AGE"


    waiting for ur next blog
    adios for now

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  2. Wish you happy belated B'day...
    Nice writeup.. :) Enjoyyyyyyyy

    ReplyDelete