Tuesday, 21 September 2010

A boon called Daughter!

It was a beautiful day!.. Early Morning rays were kissing her Good morning and she was in turn smiling in her sleep..
Ah, It was a beautiful sight! I could just watch her sleep through out the day.. Such is the serene beauty of her that emmitted a radiance wherever she went..

Every single day of my life, I thanked God for bestowing upon me nature's priceless creation. Quickly, I darted to my wardrobe to get my camera.. I had to capture this moment of blissful innocence...

We had met hardly 3 years ago but still she has become the very reason of my existence. The very reason of my slogging day and night in the office to provide her the finest of clothing, the best of education and a perfect life. But Life is far from Perfect!

Mama, What are you thinking? Asks my innocent little daughter and I am broken out of my reverie.. There I was sitting at my desk in my study and trying to analyze the situation at home.

By the way, I am a working mother to a lovely daughter. Lovely because my daughter is the most understanding thing in the world and always got along with any schedule that I conferred upon her based on my convinience..
But today, I am in a dilemma. My Inlaws are troubling me to bear a son. According to my inlaws, our family was incomplete without a heir. It is as if we are the last descendants of the species and if we die without a heir the entire species would be extinct!..
 In recent times,I have noticed somethings which were weird ( atleast according to me). My husband has started saving for my daughters wedding and my inlaws are preserving anything and everything to pass on to her in Dowry..

I dont understand... Are Girl's of today not self dependant? I have not seen any difference between a girl and a boy.. God has given both equal amount of brains, Strength.. A girl is capable of studying as much as a boy and even excels in studies in today's times.. You can see more of Girls than boys in the topper lists..
I have always known Girls who are there for their parents even after their wedding. A girl not only accepts her husband's home as her own and cares for them, She never leaves behind her own family. She just adds new responsibilities...
I have always seen, Boys struggling to take care of their parents after their wedding.. I have seen men saying what they earn is not suffice for their family hence, they cant take care of their parents, but I have never seen a girl doing the same thing.. As a girl of today, even after 3 years of my wedding, I can claim I have never put my parents down. When I can manage both my homes efficiently, Why cant a man?? Then what is the point of yearning for a son when he doesnot care for his parents?

During the times when there was an argument on this matter, My Inlaws say, there should be some one to pass on the family legacy and take care of the final rites when we die.. This is the most weirdest thing I have heard.. Why bother what happens after we die? Why cant a girl pass on the family legacy? Dont I give my daughter the same cultural upbringing as I might give my son had it been the case?
I have read in newspapers that people actually check the gender of the foetus and try to kill it just because it is a girl!... This is a murder. How can you stop a child from coming to the earth just based on what gender it is?
I have also seen people differentiating in terms of facilities.. I remember long time ago, my own uncle put his boy in a private school with better facilities and his daughter would go to the nearest govt  school. Further he stopped the girl from studying engineering even though she was a topper of her school while her brother got to go to the best Engineering college in the area although his father paid a lumpsum for his admission. But Why such a bias?? The Irony is that the girl, although was denied education is doing well in her profession and the boy who was given such  preferential treatment is working in a call center which is nowhere close to his degree! Today, My uncle is proud because he has a daughter!... Wow, thats some transformation!

Long time ago, when my sister was born, Nobody visited my mother or the baby just because it was a girl!,
Also,I remember my own grandmother forcing my mother to have a son, She even threatened to kill herself If my mother opted for the surgery!...... My mother did give into her and along came my brother.. But all along their lives they had to skrimp on things because they had to bring one more member in the family whom they couldnt afford owing to their financial commitments..And Imagine, if the third child was a girl too... then would my poor parents have been forced yet again! and if it were the case, My parents would have to just skrimp further and God knows, if they could afford us the education they have given the three of us.. had there been a fourth one!

 My parents are never to be blamed for what they did because they never differentiated between us.. But All along my life, I remember my relatives pitying my mother for having two daughters... Although, today the same relatives are proud to call both of us a part of their family just because we are successful in our fields and earn as much as a  boy could earn..What an Irony!...

The Point here is that I am against the whole idea of yearning for a son.. For me, the most important thing in this world is to provide a comfortable life to my offspring be it a boy or a girl.. I, as a person would never compromise to bring in another life when I know that I cannot afford it.. Even if it would mean I dieing without a heir apparent (whatever that means!)..

People, it is a beautiful feeling to have a daughter in your life and those of you who dont have one, you are missing out on something so exotic. I can giveup a thousand sons to have one daughter because, A son is a son till he gets himself one, But a daughter is a daughter all her life!

Please stop female infanticide. Let the girl child live. Please uphold all the rights for girlchildren. Please remember everybody has an equal right to survive, be it a boy or a girl!


  1. Nice one ... :)

    hmmm don mind but the last line was bit hurting for me....

    A son is a son till he gets himself one, But a daughter is a daughter all her life!

    OMG... :(
    ill never let my parents down :0

  2. Thts not the way I meant it to be Deepak... But, it is not completely untrue either.. I have seen many instances all my life... :)... Wait till u r married :D

  3. well written .yes i wish i had a daughter too ,but never late...:)

  4. I don't understand the bias either, esp in this day and age. The root cause though is dowry and the "paraaya" mindset about a girl. Let go of that and it will be a better society. Our generation has to get beyond the so called "traditional" shackles that are so anti-women. Raise daughters to be well educated and self reliant. And sons to respect women, be strong and responsible, to stand by what is right v/s what is "expected" as a son.