Monday, 24 January 2011

A Task called Parenting!

Hi My readers,

It is a while since I have blogged.. The obvious reason is the topic of this one :).. I have missed my "My Time" during which I used to blog, update my FB status, Check my mails, write my diary and so on...

Ok, Let me clarify one thing here. I am a working mother to a spritely little toddler who has taken upon himself to ensure his Mum never sits at one place and is constantly on her toes.. I have not known a moment of peace after he has started staying with us (P.S. My sonny was with my mum during his second year and recently started staying with us).

He has his unique way of ensuring his mum never has a moment of peace. On a normal weekday, I struggle to wake him up, get him ready to school and reach office without being late, but on weekends, the time which I look forward to catching up on some sleep, My sonny boy is up as early as 6 AM and starts demanding breakfast!
I leave him in a creche during the day and as soon as I pick him up in the evening, He starts of with an out of the world demand which unless met becomes a nasty tantrum. The most recent one being the horse ride :)

Dealing with his tantrums is still an enigma to me. I have read loads of articles on parenting but none of them seem to help me when it comes to this. All my knowledge on parenting ( both theoritical and Practical) go vain and useless.

Most of the books/articles about dealing with tantrums asks me to ignore the same or be firm about not giving in to the demand. But honestly, when the poor baby cries his heart out I just feel like giving him anything that he asks. I refrain from doing it and here I am landing in his red book. So much so that once his Papa comes home, he outrightly refuses my advances to feed him, clothe him or clean him. Which makes me rethink whether I am right in not giving in to his demands.

I try to bring in some discipline in him by making him take off his own shoes, making him eat at the dining table alone, readying his bag for school or other simple chores like putting the soiled dishes in the sink.. I know I am taxing him sometimes, but then I want him to survive independantly even if I am not with him anymore. May be I am too early in teaching him these things, but then I have always been told it is better to start early cos you can bend a plant in which ever direction you want but you cant bend a tree..

I have always had doubts in my mind about my parenting style. I dont compare myself to others but I have seen my contemporaries( read parents having same age kids) doing the same thing as me. I hate it when my son refuses me which makes me think whether I am right in doing whatever I am doing.

I feel there can never be a style defined for Parenting. Each set of parents need to define their own styles in the upbringing of their children which will suit them and their kids fine. For E.g. My friend used to put her 2 yr old in her own room and the child adjusted just fine, but when I tried the same with my son, He was back to our bedroom in just 10 mins time. Now I have stopped trying.
Many of my friends keep telling me to stop bottle feeding my son since he is already 2, but however much I try, My son resists drinking from a cup. Although he does drink from the cup, He prefers his bottle.

Now tell me, Where am I wrong?? I am so confused about the whole thing. This is one task which is proving to be herculean to me. I have been a topper all the time but this time, I fail miserably!...

I hope someday I clear my test of parenting and define my own Parenting style!..

Any Suggestions any one!